How do you eventually understand something?
Simple, it has to be observed for a long period of time. The more it is observed, described in its patterns and habits, the more it will be understood. This is the way science has reached all it’s knowledge so far. I think, If we observed ourselves constantly in what we think, feel and do, we would achieve an understanding of ourselves, which will lead us to more control of our impulses, or even bring us to an understanding of our fate.
Another method of understanding besides observation is self-inquiry. Some questions: who is this “I” that is separate? why is the “I’ in desire of that? who is this that is telling me all these things I have to do? who is judging and why, what does it want?